A baby’s first six weeks are crucial for establishing breastfeeding. Assuming that a fussy baby needs more than the breast can jeopardize progress. “Don’t manage feeding problems by yourself,” advises pediatrician Dr. Laurie Jones. “Fussing is a normal part of infancy. Reach out to your doctor if you feel you need to supplement or use a bottle.”

Compared to the immediate and steady flow of a bottle, the breast brings a nuanced dance of letdowns, spurts, and pauses. “It’s complicated and beautiful, and babies only pull from the breast what they need,” Dr. Jones says. Paced bottle feedings—with a slow-flow nipple, in an upright position, with light tugs during lulls—help mimic breastfeeding.

When it comes to preferring the bottle to the breast, every baby has a tipping point. Things can be going smoothly at, say, 30 percent bottle and 70 percent breast, then become impossible at 40/60. “It’s a seesaw,” Dr. Jones says of maintaining a balance. “Once the baby jumps off—at any age—you’re at risk of becoming an exclusive pumper."

It can take everything you have to get through those early weeks. Building a healthy breastfeeding relationship requires a lot of time—around the clock—with your baby at the breast. If you need help with household chores or simply managing your day while you breastfeed, it’s important to ask for it.

If your supply rapidly drops for any reason, including getting sick, your baby may need to be patient (and persistent) at the breast for a few days. Dr. Jones advises hydrating and direct breastfeeding to rebuild your supply: “Use the baby, not the pump—especially if your baby is older. Older infants can get a drop out of a rock.”

Doctors, advice lines, and caregivers want what’s best. But “if they’re not breastfeeding experts, their solution is often the bottle,” Dr. Jones says. “They’re fixers. You get a pat on the back—’It’s OK; breastfeeding is hard’—and it’s over. Even if you medically need a bottle to have a safe feeding plan, think through how long. Know the end game.”